Paint the town

My hands and arms were laden with bags and bulky items from a DIY shop. Was he telling me, as I struggled to find my travel pass from my pocket, that I didn't need to present my card? Why is he so animated? What is he gesturing at? And then it became clear. "You can't bring paint on
the bus."

Let me be start from the beginning. I was planning to spend the bank holiday weekend painting already white walls white - possibly the least satisfying of all decorating chores - and a lime-green wall (an unwelcome design feature left by the former owner) white too, but at least you can see where you have painted on that one.

Local DIY stores are not so easy to come by in London, unless you are one of those people who has a G-Wiz battery powered car equivalent or other, more powerful mode of four-wheeled transport. Reluctantly, but without a cost-effective alternative, off we went to Homebase (other stores are available).

With the idea that between two of us we could carry the equivalent of the cast of 60-minute Makeover, off we set on the way
to the house. A 'hail and stop' bus service operates an almost door to door service from the store. Perfect. The bus was hailed. The bus stopped. And the exchange began.

"How far are you going?" It's a simple enough question. If I say a distance that is too short, would I be encouraged to walk and be refused access? Too far, and the risks that the driver is caught with contraband cargo may be too great. Honesty, a smile and a promise to keep a firm grip on the problematic paint pots seem to have done the trick. I was on board. I was moving in the right direction and I was, for a short time, the focus of every other passenger. What had caused the delay?
Why was he (almost) refused travel?

Clearly unable to live a moment of my life without sharing it online, I took to Twitter to express my shock and surprise about this curious rule (that I still didn't quite believe could be true).

Incredibly, I'm not the only one to have been subjected to a paint and transport-related grilling, but I was the only one to have succeeded in being permitted to continue on my journey. Across London and up to Scotland, similar incidents are happening.

As far as I know, there are no warnings about what you can and can't travel with on buses or trains. Maybe it was obvious to some, but hopefully by sharing my cautionary tale of woe, at least one reader will be saved from public embarrassment and know to book a taxi in advance. Perhaps you might want to check their rules first, though.

Has anyone else experienced unexpected or unexplained rules or bylaws? Get in touch. Share with the world. In the meantime, anyone planning on some DIY over the summer months, don't say that you weren't warned.

Kevin Poulter, Editor at large @SJ_Weekly

editorial@solicitorsjournal.co.uk