First4Lawyers launches new 50/50 divorce service
Just split everything right down the middle, says marketing guru
First4Lawyers, the fastest-growing marketing collective in the UK, is today launching a new service for divorcing couples.
Designed to take the stress out of divorce, First4Lawyers' specialist divorce team will guarantee the divorce goes smoothly by simply dividing everything in half.
Andrew Cullwick, head of marketing at First4Lawyers explains: 'One of our divorce specialists will come round to your home and simply chop, saw or cut everything you own right down the middle and split them fairly between you and your estranged spouse.
'Even if a couple is arguing over the car or the sofa, our team can split this safely and fairly, helping to decide which half goes where in a matter of seconds. We can also safely halve technology and digital devices*, home furniture and accessories, cars and motors, and even clothing (for those that share).
'Unfortunately, this service does not apply to pets and we flip a coin to solve this. However, we will bring the coin to prevent arguments and we will decide who gets which side.'
*Disclaimer: Don't try this at home - here at First4Lawyers, our experts are trained and qualified in halving dangerous electrical technology and appliances, furniture, cars, and accessories.