Sunshine and showers

I work in an arena where mistakes are not acceptable. As a professional indemnity lawyer, my day job involves dealing with complaints and claims against fellow professionals who are alleged to have got something wrong. Any proven errors can be punishable by a loss of reputation and money.

Why does this not happen to weathermen? I managed to maintain a glass-half-full approach to the great British climate throughout June and most of July, having heard reports around mid-May that we were in for a decent August and a lovely Indian summer right through to late September. I even contained a sense of humour failure when the brief heatwave kicked in while I was on holiday abroad. Imagine then my instant deflation on hearing on the radio last week that the forecasters admitted they got it all wrong and August will be 'changeable', i.e. they haven't a clue.

I'm far from being a sun worshipper as it doesn't go hand in hand with a pale Irish complexion. However, I would like to have a vague steer when I get up in the morning as to whether I should don a bikini or an Eskimo suit to see me through the day.

It's not even just that the weathermen are saying it will be sunny while it pours down; they also foul it up in reverse '“ as my T in the Park festival experience illustrated beautifully. I checked the five-day weather forecast daily in the run-up to departure. It looked pretty promising for my first camping trip, with only a few light showers on one day over the whole weekend.

Weathering the storm

I worked late the night before we drove up to Scotland, and the last thing I did before shutting down my computer was make a final weather check before heading home to pack. Disaster. Having displayed a bright yellow circle and a white fluffy cloud across most of the weekend just 24 hours earlier, it now foretold of black skies, torrential rain and thunderstorms. I was not impressed but as I could do nothing about it I decided to simply grin and bear it and pack accordingly, while hoping the newly purchased tent was waterproof as advertised.

Why oh why did I do that? Had I stopped to ponder the hopeless forecasting record of the year to date, things would have been very different. We arrived in Kinross to balmy temperatures which increased the following day, leaving me fuming that my sunglasses had quite deliberately been left at home along with all my shorts.

Still, at least the sensible part of me had packed the suncream just in case'¦ what I didn't know was that my husband had unpacked it as we had to carry/drag all luggage and tents etc. quite some way from the car park to the campsite so he decided to do us a favour and lose the (obviously very heavy) factor 30. Why then we lugged four boxes of wine and a crate of beer for our group (yes wine boxes '“ you're not allowed any bottles) a mile or so on the Friday only to bring three full boxes back on the Monday remains a mystery to me and something of a sore point.

Luckily, many festivalgoers clearly had similar marital communication breakdowns and the organisers sent cheerful people around the crowds throughout the day wearing bright orange t-shirts and a clever belt holding a range of suntan lotions. An heroic effort which was much appreciated.

Back to the weathermen '“ what are they doing? Do any of them actually have an inkling what's going to happen in the next hour, never mind the next five days? How can they simply announce that they got August's forecast all wrong just two days before the month commences with no comeback? We'd be sued in the blink of an eye. It's an outrage and I may start a petition to Downing Street to have them all sent back to weather school, or wherever it is they learn their 'science'. I hope they're on performance-related pay, that would show them.

Festival frolics

As for T in the Park, it was an amazing and intense experience. The food was varied and of very good quality, the alcohol in the festival park was not too pricey despite the captive market, the toilets in the campsite were vile but we soon learned to visit the superior portaloos near the stages, and there were anti-swine flu hand sanitisers everywhere which impressively never ran out.

I think that just leaves the music, which was incredible. I had a 'back to uni' moment watching Bjorn Again and revisited my early explorations of pop with a half-hour snippet of The Pet Shop Boys. There were too many good performances to list but my favourite by a mile were The Killers who headlined the main stage on the Saturday night. I'd expected a lot and they did not disappoint.

Once I finish writing this I'll get back to my caseload which is currently made up of solicitors, surveyors, accountants and engineers. I urge you all to consider supporting my campaign to add a new profession to that list very soon. If we are all responsible for meeting a certain level of professional standards and can be held accountable for any failure to measure up, why should the weathermen escape?

Michael Fish should be shaking in his hurricane-proof galoshes.