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Behind bars | An Easter farce

Jeannie Mackie takes a trip down the river, and isn't impressed by what she finds

3 April 2013

"Easter won't be Easter without any Easter eggs," Mole said, sadly. "WHY don't we have any money?"

"Because Toad wasted it all," said Ratty, adding up figures with a stub of pencil on the back of an envelope.

"I say chaps that's not quite fair," Toad replied, snapping his new red braces against his toady tummy, "Toad Hall needed refurbishing - and a chap deserves a bonus or two for all his hard work."

"Remind me, what was the hard work precisely?" asked Ratty, mildly enough for a rodent.

" Well - er - you know - I lent all that money to those scurvy low class animals who didn't pay it back, and I had to get some more to pay it back to myself. And I did. SO there," said Toad.

"Oh good - so you got it back - does that mean we can have Easter eggs after all?" cried Mole excitedly. He did not understand finance.

"You don't understand fi...

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